The only way I can process things is to write it out; to share and connect with others through writing. It helps me to feel at peace when I write.
My Dad’s heart is failing. It has been for many years. In the past 18 months, I’ve seen him fight to stay alive. He exercised, my Mom cooked low-sodium foods, I uprooted them closer to family so they can feel love and support.
All of this helped but his condition, like some things in life, is not reversible.
Apa has been in the hospital for eight days. Yesterday was the worst day. He wanted to leave his broken body and go to a happier place. We requested comfort care: the doctors and nurses will do everything to keep him comfortable before his transition.
Today, the Doc said to me, “We can treat your dad’s coughing, headaches, upset stomach…but nothing can be done about the heart.”
I agree to a certain extent. Apa instilled in me a sense of adventure and courage. And to heal my heart, I will put on my big girl boots and keep moving forward.